My crazy ass Zoo 570 teacher
BB, my zoology teacher was clearly proven to have some sort of disorder in his brain.
This was really really my 2nd midterm paper, taken directly without any alterations whatsoever.
These were all written by him.
On the cover :
HALLOWEEN '06 EXAM
There have been, to be sure, Halloween theme exams in the past. In 1999, for example, there was such a one in this class, and it was more than a little frightening. Three students had to be taken away by EMT's after collapsing of fright. But that exam held not a flickering candle to the blazing terror you will experience with the Halloween '06 exam. It was prepared by using incantations from that ancient book of witchcraft, the Necronomicon, to create a circle of power into which the spirits of famous horror writers past and present were drawn : Steven King, Edgar Alan Poe, Henry James, Tanith Lee, Ramsey Campbell, Poppy Z. Brite, H.P. Lovecraft, and Sauk City's own August Derleth, to name a few. Each spirit was bound by the circle until it had written a question (in blood, naturally) so chilling that only the most intrepid students could answer it. These questions were transcribed and replicated for this test. Now you, if you are to progress in this class, must answer them, if you dare...
Under question # 8 :
Note : the question above and the answers are virtually identical to one that was on the example questions that were given out on Monday. Thus, anyone who gets it wrong will be subjected to a punishment too horrible to contemplate, namely, a night in the sack with Mickey Rourke and Lil' Kim.
Question # 13:
When the stop codon is in the E site, then RFs enter this site and trigger termination of translation.
a. True
b. False
c. My heart tripping, I followed the bloody footprints down the State Street sidewalk to a stygian alley here they terminated in a shallow pool of crimson gore. In the middle of the pool was an aggregate of congealed blood, in which floated a human face, attached to a shattered skull. I saw also the remnants of a body, the lower part of the torso and buttocks torn apart, as if rent by a catastrophic explosion issuing from within. The eyes and mouth of the face were closed, and encrusted with blood. Suddenly, the bulging eyes opened, lit with an evil green light. They looked directly at me. I froze. Then the mouth opened. A foul belch issued forth, redolent of onions, beans and really cheap ground beef. Then the disembodied mouth spoke the clipped, hideous words that still blast my soul : "Taco Bell".
Question # 20:
You introduce into liver cells a form of the PKA regulatory subunit that cannot bind to cAMP. Which of the following would you expect to result from this manipulations?
a. Glucose production in response to adrenaline treatment would be inhibited.
b. Glucose production would be stimulated even in the absence of adrenaline.
c. Phosphorylase kinase activity would be stimulated even in the absence of adrenaline.
d. Both b and c.
e. As you bend over the grave, weeping for one last contact with your lost loved one, your prayers are answered, horrible : a grim, skeletal hand pushes up through the stillmoist earth, reaches toward you and, with a violent jerk, grasps the underwear that is peaking out beyond your pants and gives you the wedgie of a lifetime.
Question # 26 :
yeast with a conditional mutant in the histone H4 gene are expected to transcribe the pho5 gene in the presence of extracellular phospate
a. True
b. False
c. False-hearted Jeezebel! But I paid her in her own coin, and then some, for I walled her up in the cellar, with nothing to read but back issues of Core Weekly.
Question # 31:
You live in a cell. The cell is your house. For some years you live there quietly (although without much leg room). But one day, the cell (your house) receives a hormone that binds a receptor on the plasma membrane. This causes the cell you live in to start crawling rapidly and dividing. You hope it will stop soon, but the unwanted signal keeps coming, day and night, and your house (the cell you live in) keeps dividing and crawling, dividing and crawling. You become increasingly frightened until finally you take out your cell phone and dial 911. You tell the dispatcher what you've been going through and ask to have the cops figure out where the hormone is coming from. You hang up. A short while later, the cops call you and one of them tells you:
I don't know how to say this without scaring you, but THE HORMONE IS COMING FROM INSIDE YOUR HOUSE!!!!" This is an example of:
a. Endocrine signaling.
b. Paracrine signaling.
c. Juxtacrine signaling.
d. Autocrine signaling.
e. None of the above.
Question # 38:
Which of the following manipulations would you expect to reduce the degree of cell division following treatment of epidermal cells with EGF?
a. Microinjection of cells with a form of Brg2 where A (alanine) is substituted for the tyrosines normally phosphorylated by the EFGR.
b. Microinjection of cells with a truncated form of protein kinase C that lacks the regulatory domain.
c. Microinjection of cells with a form of Brg2 that lacks SH3 domains.
d. Both a and c.
e. For many nights, I was bothered by vivid dreams, in which I found myself wandering in a desolate field, with hunger gnawing at my belly. And in these dreams, I would walk toward a mausoleum which, strangely, stood alone in the field. Each night, I got closer to the mausoleum but woke up abruptly. Five nights ago I was close enough to touch it before I woke up. Four nights ago, I reached the door. Three nights ago, I opened the door. Two nights ago, I stepped through the door. Finally, last night, after entering the mausoleum, I beheld a sumptuous feast of sweetmeats, venison, and a giant marshmellow for dessert. I ate all before me, including the marshmellow, although I had some trouble choking it down. When I awoke, my pillow was gone.
Question # 43:
You transfect a cell with a fusion construct encoding GFP linked to a form of the progesterone receptor that lacks the TAD. You wait fot his construct to be expressed, add progesterone to the cells, and then visualize the distribution of the fusion protein. Which of the following statements would you expect to be accurate under these conditions?
a. The fusion protein would be in the cytoplasm.
b. The fusion protein would be localized diffusely in the nucleus.
c. The fusion protein would be localized in discrete foci in the nucleus.
d. The fusion protein would be localized to the plasma membrane.
e. Having been raised on a hardscrabble farm, you knew little about city life, other than it sounded exciting. So you took the first opportunity to escape, and made your way to the nearest metropolis. There, at the local library, you encountered your first computer. Lacking typing skills, you nevertheless pecked your way onto the internet. Without trying, you found a link to an S&M website and before you knew it, you had arranged a meeting with aloval local (corrected by Atun) "dominant" for the next day at a corner bar. The meeting went well enough, until the dominant slipped something into your drink. You woke up on a cold metallic table. You were chained, trussed, blindfolded, and completely stripped. Not surprisingly (for you have never known for your bravery) you panicked. Then you heard the approach of a heavy tread and what sounded like the sharpening of a knife... (open picture) --> (when we open the paper with red "CONFIDENTIAL" label on it, the picture is then a keychain taking shape of a naked blindfolded chicken, with both its feet tied)
Is he (my zoology teacher) trying to say that we're chickenheads? OMG. Hahahaha...
Personally, I think the exam was hillarious, trully one of the funniest exams I've ever taken (until I saw my grade).
How do you think about my Zoo 570 professor now?
This was really really my 2nd midterm paper, taken directly without any alterations whatsoever.
These were all written by him.
On the cover :
HALLOWEEN '06 EXAM
There have been, to be sure, Halloween theme exams in the past. In 1999, for example, there was such a one in this class, and it was more than a little frightening. Three students had to be taken away by EMT's after collapsing of fright. But that exam held not a flickering candle to the blazing terror you will experience with the Halloween '06 exam. It was prepared by using incantations from that ancient book of witchcraft, the Necronomicon, to create a circle of power into which the spirits of famous horror writers past and present were drawn : Steven King, Edgar Alan Poe, Henry James, Tanith Lee, Ramsey Campbell, Poppy Z. Brite, H.P. Lovecraft, and Sauk City's own August Derleth, to name a few. Each spirit was bound by the circle until it had written a question (in blood, naturally) so chilling that only the most intrepid students could answer it. These questions were transcribed and replicated for this test. Now you, if you are to progress in this class, must answer them, if you dare...
Under question # 8 :
Note : the question above and the answers are virtually identical to one that was on the example questions that were given out on Monday. Thus, anyone who gets it wrong will be subjected to a punishment too horrible to contemplate, namely, a night in the sack with Mickey Rourke and Lil' Kim.
Question # 13:
When the stop codon is in the E site, then RFs enter this site and trigger termination of translation.
a. True
b. False
c. My heart tripping, I followed the bloody footprints down the State Street sidewalk to a stygian alley here they terminated in a shallow pool of crimson gore. In the middle of the pool was an aggregate of congealed blood, in which floated a human face, attached to a shattered skull. I saw also the remnants of a body, the lower part of the torso and buttocks torn apart, as if rent by a catastrophic explosion issuing from within. The eyes and mouth of the face were closed, and encrusted with blood. Suddenly, the bulging eyes opened, lit with an evil green light. They looked directly at me. I froze. Then the mouth opened. A foul belch issued forth, redolent of onions, beans and really cheap ground beef. Then the disembodied mouth spoke the clipped, hideous words that still blast my soul : "Taco Bell".
Question # 20:
You introduce into liver cells a form of the PKA regulatory subunit that cannot bind to cAMP. Which of the following would you expect to result from this manipulations?
a. Glucose production in response to adrenaline treatment would be inhibited.
b. Glucose production would be stimulated even in the absence of adrenaline.
c. Phosphorylase kinase activity would be stimulated even in the absence of adrenaline.
d. Both b and c.
e. As you bend over the grave, weeping for one last contact with your lost loved one, your prayers are answered, horrible : a grim, skeletal hand pushes up through the stillmoist earth, reaches toward you and, with a violent jerk, grasps the underwear that is peaking out beyond your pants and gives you the wedgie of a lifetime.
Question # 26 :
yeast with a conditional mutant in the histone H4 gene are expected to transcribe the pho5 gene in the presence of extracellular phospate
a. True
b. False
c. False-hearted Jeezebel! But I paid her in her own coin, and then some, for I walled her up in the cellar, with nothing to read but back issues of Core Weekly.
Question # 31:
You live in a cell. The cell is your house. For some years you live there quietly (although without much leg room). But one day, the cell (your house) receives a hormone that binds a receptor on the plasma membrane. This causes the cell you live in to start crawling rapidly and dividing. You hope it will stop soon, but the unwanted signal keeps coming, day and night, and your house (the cell you live in) keeps dividing and crawling, dividing and crawling. You become increasingly frightened until finally you take out your cell phone and dial 911. You tell the dispatcher what you've been going through and ask to have the cops figure out where the hormone is coming from. You hang up. A short while later, the cops call you and one of them tells you:
I don't know how to say this without scaring you, but THE HORMONE IS COMING FROM INSIDE YOUR HOUSE!!!!" This is an example of:
a. Endocrine signaling.
b. Paracrine signaling.
c. Juxtacrine signaling.
d. Autocrine signaling.
e. None of the above.
Question # 38:
Which of the following manipulations would you expect to reduce the degree of cell division following treatment of epidermal cells with EGF?
a. Microinjection of cells with a form of Brg2 where A (alanine) is substituted for the tyrosines normally phosphorylated by the EFGR.
b. Microinjection of cells with a truncated form of protein kinase C that lacks the regulatory domain.
c. Microinjection of cells with a form of Brg2 that lacks SH3 domains.
d. Both a and c.
e. For many nights, I was bothered by vivid dreams, in which I found myself wandering in a desolate field, with hunger gnawing at my belly. And in these dreams, I would walk toward a mausoleum which, strangely, stood alone in the field. Each night, I got closer to the mausoleum but woke up abruptly. Five nights ago I was close enough to touch it before I woke up. Four nights ago, I reached the door. Three nights ago, I opened the door. Two nights ago, I stepped through the door. Finally, last night, after entering the mausoleum, I beheld a sumptuous feast of sweetmeats, venison, and a giant marshmellow for dessert. I ate all before me, including the marshmellow, although I had some trouble choking it down. When I awoke, my pillow was gone.
Question # 43:
You transfect a cell with a fusion construct encoding GFP linked to a form of the progesterone receptor that lacks the TAD. You wait fot his construct to be expressed, add progesterone to the cells, and then visualize the distribution of the fusion protein. Which of the following statements would you expect to be accurate under these conditions?
a. The fusion protein would be in the cytoplasm.
b. The fusion protein would be localized diffusely in the nucleus.
c. The fusion protein would be localized in discrete foci in the nucleus.
d. The fusion protein would be localized to the plasma membrane.
e. Having been raised on a hardscrabble farm, you knew little about city life, other than it sounded exciting. So you took the first opportunity to escape, and made your way to the nearest metropolis. There, at the local library, you encountered your first computer. Lacking typing skills, you nevertheless pecked your way onto the internet. Without trying, you found a link to an S&M website and before you knew it, you had arranged a meeting with a
Is he (my zoology teacher) trying to say that we're chickenheads? OMG. Hahahaha...
Personally, I think the exam was hillarious, trully one of the funniest exams I've ever taken (until I saw my grade).
How do you think about my Zoo 570 professor now?
posted by siduahuruf @ 10:33 p. m.
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