I cried for the first time

1st of October 2006.

I will remember today as the day when he, who I thought will never, makes me literally cry for the first time.
I will remember today as the day when I hate him, though it's the smallest hatred there can be. Hatred that comes from trust and lie.
I will remember today as the day when I argue badly with him.
I will remember today as the day when I realize he just doesn't want me to be there, due to the unclear reason.
I will remember today as the day when I start torturing myself with endless thoughts with endless possibilities.
I will remember today as the day when he puts something between our friendship, which I wrongfully thought he considered important, "in only 24 hours" if I may quote it from himself.
I will remember today as the day when I realize there's always a worse fact than what you know superficially.
I will remember today as the day when I don't cry much, but every tear just cuts deep.

I will remember today as I remember any other days I was really hurt.

Remember when he made a promise to never hold back once we already said something and we must finish what we have started? He lied that time, too! I made that promise, too, and I keep it. That's the difference between him and me! And still, in this hard time, I find myself respecting him.